friends are like bits and bits of puzzle of my heart.. if I lose any of them I will feel incomplete, it will make me feel like I lost my heart..
I know.. this is me.. but if u are so close to her like you see her everyday and you talk to her and gossip about other people together.. the laughter and tears are memories that cannot be stolen and why do u choose to throw them all away? I don't get it??
I was fighting with D, S and T. but D and I finally came back together.. when we chat now we are like "why did we actually fight.. so weird" "gosh, I miss you" "I have so many things to tell you" "wow! we haven't talked for THAT long?!?!?" ya.. I know.. its very painful to be gossiped and to gossip about and by your own buddy. but it can all turn back around.. why do u want to choose the path which leads you to a dark and gloomy day? why don't you choose the path where you can always be happy and filled with sunshine? *sigh*
I feel so sad not seeing you guys together.. u both miss yourselves so much but why the ego? I know for u both it is very hard to apologize but why not try just to fix your relationship? why? I don't get it?!?! I don't mind saying sorry and I don't mind being punished as long as I benefit out of it.. just think! if you don't try how would you know she'll reject you?? try and benefit! if she really rejects you in the end, at least you know that you've tried.. I'm tearing now even it is not me. I'm tearing with questions!
I see the whole picture jie, I really do! I'm not looking at half the picture! I see the whole thing! I don't know why you have to treat me like this? you've never TRIED to listen how I felt, what I think! you always think you are right! since young! letting your anger on me since young is your habit ( I get it ) but can't you try to see me as a sister for once!? I'm not born into this world to be your dummy! I'm always with you and will forever be by your side! that's a vow I've made since the day I was born! I'm helping you but why do you think I'm helping her?!?!? I'm advising you for the better not to blame you! even if it isn't your fault can you just try to let your ego go and fix your relationship with your buddy that will be there for you other than me? I'm sick of seeing your hatred eyes! I'm sick of hearing your complaints about other people! don't ask people whether they own a mirror or not, ask yourself first.. you own large mirrors in your room but why don't you reflect your character and see what it has done? *sigh*
anyways.. I've finished what I need and have to say..
I hope you'll understand me more than just a dummy that takes in your anger..
=) I don't blame you. I understand.
its up to you, your future is in your hands.. I'm here to support and be with you until my last breath.
I love you jie.. I really do!! I'm sorry for yelling at you just now.. another thing.. you can listen to God too! pray and hear.. you'll do what's right when the time comes, I believe in you!
PS: I'm going for the PERAK camp to ease my mind.. so I'll miss you.. I hope you read this..
cried and will always be crying,
hannah~
